“I’m Never Drinking Again” Says Student Going to the Pub Again Tonight
Even before we published this one, we had received at least 25 complaints of “I said that to you in confidence” from multiple individuals.
→Tagged: satire
Wessex Scene Rewrites Novel for the Pandemic
Can you come up with any?
→Student ‘Shocked and Disappointed’ that They are Two Days Late to their Online Seminar
Turns out that they are just relaying what their parents said to them when they found out they were doing a Humanities degree.
→Biden to Replace Trump’s Soda Button with Soft Serve Lever
Ever imagine the microphone you’re holding is a 99? Maybe you too could benefit from your very own Soft Serve lever!
→The Quarantine Guide to… I’ll Eat What I Want Now, Mother
‘Parents just don’t understand the importance of seasoning with those cheap supermarket packets, do they?’
→It’s a Sonnet! But Who is the Lover? Is It You?
Hilarious reveal poems? We got ’em!
→New Online Currency Uses Gossip as Stock Market Value
Zip it, lock it, dollar straight in your pocket.
→‘2021 Will Not Be Your Year,’ Confirms Nostradamus
Sam Pegg details the incredibly interesting discovery of a quick-Earth fix recipe!
→
‘Still I Ride’ – Extracts from the Personal Journal of Mr Johnson
Mr Johnson finds time to practice his poetry in his latest diary entry.
→Undirected Message in Group Chat Found to Actually be Super Directed
‘Stop leaving the kitchen in a state,’ because if it’s in quote marks then you won’t think I’ve written this about you.
→